saying “no” to make space

Do you ever say “yes” when you’d rather say “no”?

I know I do.

When I was growing up, I was taught to say “yes” to everything (and everyone). This created a people-pleasing, overthinking, stressed-out, anxious perfectionist.

Here’s a random sampling inside my brain when someone asks me to do something I could do, that I don’t necessarily want to do:

What will <insert name> think if I say no?

Who else will they find to do it?

Will they still value me?

Will <random person> do it as well as me? Will they do it BETTER than me?

Should I just do it anyway?

Is it worth the energy for me to teach someone else how to do it?

So I usually say “yes, of course.”

Who can relate? (If you can’t relate, I’m so happy for you! You can skip this post. For those who relate, keep reading!)

As an adult, saying “yes” is an automatic response that leaves me feeling burned out, resentful, and exhausted.

When all of our time, energy, and attention goes to activities to fulfill our obligations, there’s not much space left for activities that bring joy.

That’s why it’s important to say “no” to things to create space. If this scares you (or you have no idea where to start), I have an exercise to help you get started.

Today’s mindful minute is a tool to help learn to say “no”

Today’s mindful minute is a simple tool to pause before responding.

Try it, right now. Whatever you’re doing, take one minute to do this exercise.

Remember that you can always download the slide and save it to your phone (when we’re stressed, we will not naturally remember to be mindful!).

Now that you have practiced the tool . . .

What do you notice?

Try to answer without judgement. Whatever you notice is simply what you noticed; it’s not right, wrong, or indifferent.

Can you make a reminder to yourself to do this once a day this week??

For more support in creating a mindfulness habit, text MINDFUL to +1-480-531-9810 for a free, daily mindful minute prompt!

before you go…

I am In the running to be the next Yoga Warrior!

I was selected based on my platform of wanting to make yoga + mindfulness accessible. I currently do that with my daily mindfulness text, this blog, and my Instagram and TikTok content. I have big dreams of doing more to help others, and I’d love your support! Here’s how you can help:

vote for me!

If I win, I’ll be featured in The Yoga Journal + win a $10,000 cash prize to support my work.

Would you be willing to vote for me?

If so, you can cast a FREE vote daily through the end of the month! Just click the button below.

You can also pay for additional votes, with 25% of the proceeds going to The Veterans Yoga Project (a 501c nonprofit).

You can vote every 24 hours, so set an alarm or reminder to optimize your voting potential!

Voting to get into the Top 10 in my group closes Thursday, 3/25 at 7pm PST!